Crying, settling and sleep

What is normal

• Newborns cry to communicate, and have unsettled periods day and night. This is part of normal development, not a sign you are doing something wrong
• Crying often peaks around six to eight weeks, then eases by three to four months
• Newborn sleep comes in short cycles of about 20 to 40 minutes, and babies wake often, including for feeds

Gentle ways to settle

• Offer comfort first: a cuddle, gentle "shh" sounds, rhythmic patting or rocking, or a wrap with arms free to move
• Check the basics, a feed, a clean nappy, not too hot or cold, and time for a burp
• A walk in the pram or a change of scene can help settle both of you
• A simple feed, play, sleep rhythm helps your baby learn the cues for sleep
• Responsive settling, staying with your baby and comforting them, is gentle and effective. Controlled crying is not recommended for young babies

When it all feels like too much

It is okay to find this hard. If you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, put your baby down safely in the cot, step away for a few minutes, and take some slow breaths. Never shake a baby. Call someone, a partner, a friend, or one of the helplines below, and see your GP or child and family health nurse if you are worried about your baby or yourself.

When to get it checked

Sometimes there is a reason behind a lot of crying. See your GP if your baby is crying much more than usual, is hard to settle and seems unwell, is feeding poorly, or you sense something is not right. Trust your instinct.